Debt. That four letter word no-one wants to hear. A lot of people actually in debt don’t even want to think about that four letter word let alone face up to it. Yes, being in debt is fairly tough and the hubby and I often used to feel totally fed up about our situation. But over time, we’ve changed our perspective to that of a more positive one and now when we look hard enough, we can see a glimmer of a silver lining. Even with a great big pile of debt still to pay off!
I’ve been in debt for 14 years, ever since I was old enough to get credit. The same for my hubby. Together we’ve struggled with debt and there have been times when we’ve hit an all time low emotionally thinking that there was no light at the end of the tunnel. Until January of this year, that is.
Something just hit us that no matter what, we had to get rid of the debts. Obviously we’d been thinking this for years on and off, but somehow this time it felt different. The timing was right! But the question at the forefront of our minds was: “How on earth can we even start tackling the debts properly when we are earning less than half of our salaries compared to just a few years ago?”
Our combined income three years ago before having our daughter was around £67K per year (almost $107K USD). We were struggling with debts then and couldn’t afford to pay more than the minimum (or so we thought). Now due to a change in work circumstances and a relocation, we earn around £31K (just over $49K USD) between us and we now also have a child to support.
To our own surprise, and quite frankly amazement, we have paid nearly £7K off our debts so far this year, which is more than we’ve ever managed before. We have all the usual household bills to pay but we don’t buy luxury items or services at all. In fact, we pretty much don’t spend on anything other than bills and overpaying debts!
And you know what? We don’t mind. Honestly, we really don’t. We’d do pretty much anything to get rid of these debts now once and for all so not spending money is a reminder that we’re doing everything we can to get rid of them. That makes us happy!
For the first time since being in debt, we’re feeling positive about the progress we’ve made.
And now for the silver lining?
As the title of this post gives away: debt has given me a taste of freedom. I’m talking about my silver lining here and not the hubby’s – although he has his own silver lining to think about. Let me explain about mine.
Three years ago, I was tied to a job which I didn’t enjoy and where I worked long hours with a relentless overflowing in-tray. I had zero work life balance and at one extremely low point, I was diagnosed with depression. (I still didn’t take any time off work though!) One night whilst seven months pregnant I actually worked until 11pm (from 7am) because I had to deliver on a project deadline. Boy oh boy, this was not a happy time for me.
For several years, I thought I couldn’t leave this job because of the massive debts we had – surely we both had to earn a decent salary to keep us afloat and make sure our house didn’t get repossessed?
When our daughter was born, I decided happiness was really important and at that time felt strong enough to make the decision to leave my job which coincided nicely with relocating to be closer to the hubby’s business. After desperately looking around for jobs in a new area (unsuccessfully), I decided to set up a small business from home working around my daughter as a temporary measure, in order to bring in some income.
With me working at home, luckily we don’t have to pay for childcare now but our earnings have dropped significantly. Yet we’re managing to pay off the debts now at last as well as surviving day to day with a roof over our heads and making sure we live a reasonably full life!
Not only am I now working at home with a bit more work life balance, I can see that in the future, paying off these debts will set me free. By this, I mean that I won’t have to worry about the debts before making decisions about what I want my future to look like.
If I can survive now and help to support my family whilst we’re paying off a mountain of debt, I know that when the debts have gone, I will be able to do whatever work I’m passionate about. Instead of joining the rat race again when my daughter is in school, I can leave the 9-5 working environment, the stress, the office politics and bureaucracy, for good.
I can see more clearly the path that I want to take to ensure my work fits around what’s important: my family and loved ones.
Looking for something positive in any difficult situation can be tricky and being in debt is no exception to that. But being in debt and paying it back doesn’t have to be all bad news. A situation like this can come with all sorts of life lessons and opportunities along the way.
This post is part of The Gift of Debt Series an eight-day, multi-blogger extravaganza designed to give you the permission to kick up your heels, embrace your debt with glee and look forward to finding the gold at the end of the rainbow. Follow along in the series as we tell the story of our gift and encourage you to find yours.
Related posts:
- I will not give in: the cycle of debt has been broken!
- Keep Calm and Carry On! Part 1
- Keep Calm and Carry On! Part 2
Image courtesy of Taynia at The Fiscal Flamingo
43 Comments
I think it’s great that you have managed to find a silver lining in all of your debt. Now that you can tackle the debt repayments, even on a lower income, you’ll always know that you can live on less and achieve real freedom, and probably sooner than someone living paycheque to paycheque with no debt.
Nell @ The Million Dollar Diva recently posted…Are Women Really Bad with Money?
Thanks so much Nell! Paying off debts like this on a lower income does give me reassurance for the future and as you say real freedom will eventually be within my reach!
This is how you tackle debt. You have to look for the silver lining of it. If you let it consume you, you will never get rid of it and you have figured it out. Good luck on your continued journey!
Grayson @ Debt Roundup recently posted…Home Loans: Is It Time To Refinance?
Thanks Grayson for your support, I really appreciate it! Once we kept finding ways to progress debt repayment and keep positive above all else, then things really started to change for the better!
I hadn’t realized you worked from home on your own business. I hope it does well. I’d love to learn more about it but understand if you need to keep a degree of anonymity.
Done by Forty recently posted…Budget Porn
It’s not very exciting but it pays the bills (just)! I might do a post about it one day… 😉
Hayley recently posted…Friday’s Fab Links #16
Hayley, your story mimics ours very closely, and I feel exactly the same way!!! Both of us will have our debt free celebration one day, and what a happy day that will be. Kudos to you for having a terrific attitude, girl!
Laurie @thefrugalfarmer recently posted…October 2013 Recap
Thanks so much Laurie! I think you have a brilliant attitude towards debt too – being positive is half the battle! We will definitely both be celebrating one day! 🙂
Love this post! It’s important to see the silver lining, especially when you feel like giving up. It’s amazing how a sudden life change can alter our world completely….on the surface, it looks bad, but on a deeper level it’s much better for us.
Dear Debt recently posted…Please seek help
Thanks so much for your support – the lessons learned from being in debt are quite invaluable aren’t they! Once we’ve got a handle on the debt, it certainly does make us stronger!
I LOVED this post Hayley! As ironic as it first sounds, debt repayment really IS a taste of financial freedom! I’ve enjoyed following your story from the very beginning and I hope to follow it to the very last payment!
Girl Meets Debt recently posted…Kindness
Thanks so much GMD! I feel freer with every debt repayment! Likewise, I’ve enjoyed following your story and will be with you until the bitter (sweet) end!
I love your silver lining, Hayley. As much as a pain getting out of debt can be, it really can also be a gift. I see it every day. People feel more empowered, more confident with how to handle their money, have goal clarity and really understand what they want out of life – like you do now. And that is a wonderful thing to work towards.
Shannon @ The Heavy Purse recently posted…How to Flip the Switch and Develop a Budget Mindset
Thanks Shannon! It’s a great lesson in finances once we’ve got a handle on things! If only they taught stuff about debt in schools?
I’m really happy that you’re following your heart and are able to work from home and do what you love. I’m sure you’ll only get busier with more business coming from the blog! What I realised is that “if there is a will, there is a way”, irrespective of how much money you bring home. I didn’t have any “spare money” in my budget not so long ago. These days, earning the same salary I part with nearly £1k per month and throw it on my debt. You’re doing so great with your debt repayment, Hayley! Keep thinking about your end goal, it will all be worth it in the end! 😛
Eva @ Girl Counting Pennies recently posted…Cost of Living in London
Thanks Eva! It’s funny how it really is possible to squeeze spare money out of an already tight budget if you try and look hard enough. You’re doing brilliant with your debts too and I really like how you’re still managing to live your life and follow your dream of travelling at the same time!
Thanks so much for Hayley for being part of this series. You really do rock girl!
Taynia || The Fiscal Flamingo recently posted…The Gift of Debt: A Taste Of Freedom
Thanks Taynia! You’re the brain child behind this great series – I think a lot of people in debt will benefit from viewing their situation somewhat positively! So thank you for putting this all together!
Love this post! I’m in a similar position to where you were in the past, stuck in an impossible job that I’m not enjoying. We’ve recently started making plans, sorting out the finances, and taking steps toward changing the situation, and I am already feeling a little bit more “free,” although not as much as I imagine I will feel in hopefully the near future. It’s all about how we look at it, right?
Color Me Frugal recently posted…Passive Income/Side Hustle Update: October 2013
Thank you! Just taking those baby steps to where you want to be will help hugely in terms of your motivation and morale when it comes to work. Getting finances in place is a big part of being happy at work because it gives you more choices. You might even find that you need less to live on than you first thought!
Wonderful post Hayley!! I’m glad to read that your debt is not controlling your life and that you are taking a proactive stance in making sure it never does.
“When our daughter was born, I decided happiness was really important…” – this is HUGE!!!! THAT is your gift 🙂
Take care Hayley and all the best to you and yours.
Lyle
lyle @ The Joy of Simple recently posted…The Love You Get Is Equal To The Love You Give!!
Thanks Lyle! You’re right – everything I do and every decision I make is pretty much focused around my little girl, I’m so grateful for her and how she’s changed my life! 🙂
There has to be a “light at the end of the tunnel” or paying off the debt feels like a never-ending journey. Happiness is so important and you have such a beautiful outlook on life and debt.
KK @ Student Debt Survivor recently posted…The Size of Your Package Matters!
Thanks KK! Happiness is really important and debts can be a stumbling block to that road of happiness. It’s a case of taking each hurdle one at a time and focusing on the finishing line!
Hi Hayley,
Sounds like you’re much happier making half the money. You’ve got a plan and executing it, keep up the good outlook.
Charles@gettingarichlife recently posted…Should Poor People Live Better Than The People That Support Them?
Thanks so much Charles – I’m definitely happier now than before when I was earning a good wage. I hope to earn more money again of course but by stripping things back to basics, I know that once the debts have gone, I won’t NEED an awful lot of money to be happy.
Debt, debt, debt and debt. Why is this 4-letter word in every part of the world? Still, I believe it is a major reason why we know and value financial freedom in its truest sense. Having said that, I wish you all the best in your journey towards attaining a debt-free life. Kindly wish me the same. Oh well.
Jen @ Frugal Rules recently posted…Ask Yourself These 3 Honest Questions About Money
Thanks Jen – good luck in your journey to debt freedom too! 🙂
Hayley, I really like your positive spin on being in debt. It really is possible to climb out of it, and what a way to do it – together! CJ and I are doing the same and enjoying the ride. We are coming up with plans we’ve never before considered and wholeheartedly agree that balance and spending time with those you love and doing things you love is more important than any “thing” we could possibly buy. What great role models you and your husband are for anyone who wants to but isn’t sure how to go about it!
Tammy R recently posted…Leaving the “Comfort” Zone
Thanks Tammy! I think once someone is serious about tackling debt, they do look at things differently and over time their mindset starts to change. That’s what has happened with us. I wish you and CJ all the best in your journey to debt freedom. You’re the most positive couple I’ve come across so far in the world of blogging so I have no doubt that your journey to debt freedom won’t take too long!
It’s really great you can look ahead and see how worth it everything will be in the end. That was quite a significant income drop and yet you both are still finding a way to pay off your debt. Best of luck!
Budget and the Beach recently posted…Ways to Protect Yourself on Your Vacation
Thanks Tonya! I hope one day we’ll earn more again but it’s promising that we’ve made such good progress now and that stands us in good stead for the future! Yay!
It never ceases to amaze me how much money it takes to support a career, and how that $80K a year salary ends up only contributing perhaps a quarter of that in usable income. But when you have a child, suddenly it becomes very clear – pay a stranger to care for your child, or give up the income and gain all that savings.
I used to think the single earner household was an impossibility. Then I saw the cost of daycare. 🙂
It’s amazing what you can accomplish with clear objectives, and the determination to make it happen.
Jack @ Enwealthen recently posted…Great Enwealthen Anniversary Giveaway 2013
Thanks Jack – Childcare is so expensive, I know several families who are only just breaking even on their income/outgoings because of the fact they have to pay out so much for childcare!
It’s so inspiring to read about how people deal with their debt with such good grace and a positive outlook. Thanks for sharing some of your story! I can say, from someone 10 steps behind you blogging but 10 steps ahead in paying off my debt, as someone one paycheck away from mailing in her last payment on $30,000 of debt it is an INCREDIBLE feeling. And while I’m not happy to have dug a hole that big even for something as useful as my education, I am happy for the money lessons it taught that I never would’ve learned otherwise.
Mel @ brokeGIRLrich recently posted…Five Dolla’ Make You Holla’ Holiday Series: Husband
Thanks so much Mel for stopping by! Congratulations on your ‘soon to be’ debt freedom! That’s amazing! What will you do once your last payment has been made? Have you booked a well deserved holiday or treat for yourself? I’m not sure what I’ll do once the debts are gone – but it will probably be one of those two things!
Your story certainly serves as a clear reminder of finding that silver lining even in the darkest of clouds. i think its a good thing that you changed your focus from so much on debt to happiness and enjoying time with your daughter, in the grand scheme of things…family certainly comes first, all else can be sorted with time and sooner that you know it, you will debt free and probably living a different kind of life because of the key lessons you have picked over time.
Simon @ Modest Money recently posted…TradeKing Review – Exclusive Review of TradeKing Brokerage
Thanks Simon! I used to be utterly depressed about our debt. But life really is too short. Everyone has their own problems whether it be debt related or not. I think it really is important to keep in mind what makes you happy, even if it will take a long time to get there.
I love this positive view of debt! The more you pay off, the closer to freedom you get. Always cheerin’ for ya, Hayley!
Lisa E. @ Lisa Vs. The Loans recently posted…Links Lisa Likes – 11/11/13
Thanks so much Lisa! Your support means so much to me! 🙂
Such a great attitude! Family and happiness are high on our agenda, as well. And money problems are just that: problems with money. They can effect us, but with a good attitude like yours and a plan, they don’t have to govern us.
femmefrugality recently posted…Financially Savvy Saturdays Eleventh Edition
Thanks so much! Family is much more important than money when it comes down to it. 🙂
Hayley recently posted…Beauty is in the eye of the debt holder